19 Hilarious Scottish Memes With Translation To English

Kenneth Coo Published 05/10/2017

This time we can understand what are they saying.

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1.
I asked my dad for cheese on toast and received borderline child abuse
2.
My dad is really angry at me because I came in drunk last night and fed all the ham in the fridge to the cats in the street
3.
You know you're Scottish when someone asks you for a lighter for their cigarette and you apologize for not smoking
4.
It's always stupid little shops that check that your bank notes aren't forgeries. Calm down mate, if I knew how to print money I wouldn't be using it to buy milk and a Freddo (child's chocolate bar)
5.
I remember when my brother had a girl up for dinner and I choked on spaghetti. My mum had to pull it out of my throat hahaha, don't know why she even came back
6.
I mean, I'd call them dead but alright goth
7.
My little sister's telling me to "get my facts right." Well, here's a fact, childline (phone service that you call to report child abuse) can't unpunch the fuck out of you'
8.
Got home last night and swallowed a 5p thinking it was a Rennie's (indigestion tablet) hahaha. Not even going to be able to afford a bag to pick up my shit
9.
Girls are like "me and my friends should be locked up". Calm down woman, I don't think texting someone you fancy when you're drunk deserves jail time you fucking twat
10.
Yeah don't put the change in my hand, sit the coins flat on the counter so I have to claw and fondle them back awkwardly in front of you for 6 days
11.
Why do people say "mail me" when somebody asks about their new job? No bother Sandra, you're part time in Home Bargains (a shit discount shop) not undercover with MI5
12.
Edinburgh's like that girl who's unreal pretty but really boring and Glasgow's the fatty that shows you a good time
13.
So funny at house parties on a Friday when everyone just gets too drunk and starts shouting their shift times like "I'm working 12-8 tomorrow"
14.
Right, hold the bus, who picks up a guide dog's shit?
15.
Can't stand when you're looking for something and you ask your mum where it is and she hits you with "where you left it". Yeah no bother Mystic Meg (British psychic from the 90s) fuck off
16.
I could go to the moon and back, fight two wars and still if an old friend I went to school with asked me what I'd been up to I'd still say "nothing mate, you?"
17.
Two little boys were arguing and one was like "at least I'm not a junkie" and the other replied "at least I'm not a Kit Kat chunky" because he was fat. I'm dead
18.
People who are not Scottish will never understand the struggles we face trying to pronounce the name Carl
19.
It annoys me when I put my hand out to wave for the bus and a person behind me puts their hand out too. What, do you not trust me or something? Do you have a magic hand?

1.
I asked my dad for cheese on toast and received borderline child abuse
2.
My dad is really angry at me because I came in drunk last night and fed all the ham in the fridge to the cats in the street
3.
You know you're Scottish when someone asks you for a lighter for their cigarette and you apologize for not smoking
4.
It's always stupid little shops that check that your bank notes aren't forgeries. Calm down mate, if I knew how to print money I wouldn't be using it to buy milk and a Freddo (child's chocolate bar)
5.
I remember when my brother had a girl up for dinner and I choked on spaghetti. My mum had to pull it out of my throat hahaha, don't know why she even came back
6.
I mean, I'd call them dead but alright goth
7.
My little sister's telling me to "get my facts right." Well, here's a fact, childline (phone service that you call to report child abuse) can't unpunch the fuck out of you'
8.
Got home last night and swallowed a 5p thinking it was a Rennie's (indigestion tablet) hahaha. Not even going to be able to afford a bag to pick up my shit
9.
Girls are like "me and my friends should be locked up". Calm down woman, I don't think texting someone you fancy when you're drunk deserves jail time you fucking twat
10.
Yeah don't put the change in my hand, sit the coins flat on the counter so I have to claw and fondle them back awkwardly in front of you for 6 days
11.
Why do people say "mail me" when somebody asks about their new job? No bother Sandra, you're part time in Home Bargains (a shit discount shop) not undercover with MI5
12.
Edinburgh's like that girl who's unreal pretty but really boring and Glasgow's the fatty that shows you a good time
13.
So funny at house parties on a Friday when everyone just gets too drunk and starts shouting their shift times like "I'm working 12-8 tomorrow"
14.
Right, hold the bus, who picks up a guide dog's shit?
15.
Can't stand when you're looking for something and you ask your mum where it is and she hits you with "where you left it". Yeah no bother Mystic Meg (British psychic from the 90s) fuck off
16.
I could go to the moon and back, fight two wars and still if an old friend I went to school with asked me what I'd been up to I'd still say "nothing mate, you?"
17.
Two little boys were arguing and one was like "at least I'm not a junkie" and the other replied "at least I'm not a Kit Kat chunky" because he was fat. I'm dead
18.
People who are not Scottish will never understand the struggles we face trying to pronounce the name Carl
19.
It annoys me when I put my hand out to wave for the bus and a person behind me puts their hand out too. What, do you not trust me or something? Do you have a magic hand?

I asked my dad for cheese on toast and received borderline child abuse

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1. I asked my dad for cheese on toast and received borderline child abuse

2. My dad is really angry at me because I came in drunk last night and fed all the ham in the fridge to the cats in the street

3. You know you're Scottish when someone asks you for a lighter for their cigarette and you apologize for not smoking

4. It's always stupid little shops that check that your bank notes aren't forgeries. Calm down mate, if I knew how to print money I wouldn't be using it to buy milk and a Freddo (child's chocolate bar)

5. I remember when my brother had a girl up for dinner and I choked on spaghetti. My mum had to pull it out of my throat hahaha, don't know why she even came back

6. I mean, I'd call them dead but alright goth

7. My little sister's telling me to "get my facts right." Well, here's a fact, childline (phone service that you call to report child abuse) can't unpunch the fuck out of you'

8. Got home last night and swallowed a 5p thinking it was a Rennie's (indigestion tablet) hahaha. Not even going to be able to afford a bag to pick up my shit

9. Girls are like "me and my friends should be locked up". Calm down woman, I don't think texting someone you fancy when you're drunk deserves jail time you fucking twat

10. Yeah don't put the change in my hand, sit the coins flat on the counter so I have to claw and fondle them back awkwardly in front of you for 6 days

11. Why do people say "mail me" when somebody asks about their new job? No bother Sandra, you're part time in Home Bargains (a shit discount shop) not undercover with MI5

12. Edinburgh's like that girl who's unreal pretty but really boring and Glasgow's the fatty that shows you a good time

13. So funny at house parties on a Friday when everyone just gets too drunk and starts shouting their shift times like "I'm working 12-8 tomorrow"

14. Right, hold the bus, who picks up a guide dog's shit?

15. Can't stand when you're looking for something and you ask your mum where it is and she hits you with "where you left it". Yeah no bother Mystic Meg (British psychic from the 90s) fuck off

16. I could go to the moon and back, fight two wars and still if an old friend I went to school with asked me what I'd been up to I'd still say "nothing mate, you?"

17. Two little boys were arguing and one was like "at least I'm not a junkie" and the other replied "at least I'm not a Kit Kat chunky" because he was fat. I'm dead

18. People who are not Scottish will never understand the struggles we face trying to pronounce the name Carl

19. It annoys me when I put my hand out to wave for the bus and a person behind me puts their hand out too. What, do you not trust me or something? Do you have a magic hand?

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eBaum's Picks

1.
I asked my dad for cheese on toast and received borderline child abuse

2.
My dad is really angry at me because I came in drunk last night and fed all the ham in the fridge to the cats in the street

3.
You know you're Scottish when someone asks you for a lighter for their cigarette and you apologize for not smoking

4.
It's always stupid little shops that check that your bank notes aren't forgeries. Calm down mate, if I knew how to print money I wouldn't be using it to buy milk and a Freddo (child's chocolate bar)

5.
I remember when my brother had a girl up for dinner and I choked on spaghetti. My mum had to pull it out of my throat hahaha, don't know why she even came back

6.
I mean, I'd call them dead but alright goth

7.
My little sister's telling me to "get my facts right." Well, here's a fact, childline (phone service that you call to report child abuse) can't unpunch the fuck out of you'

8.
Got home last night and swallowed a 5p thinking it was a Rennie's (indigestion tablet) hahaha. Not even going to be able to afford a bag to pick up my shit

9.
Girls are like "me and my friends should be locked up". Calm down woman, I don't think texting someone you fancy when you're drunk deserves jail time you fucking twat

10.
Yeah don't put the change in my hand, sit the coins flat on the counter so I have to claw and fondle them back awkwardly in front of you for 6 days

11.
Why do people say "mail me" when somebody asks about their new job? No bother Sandra, you're part time in Home Bargains (a shit discount shop) not undercover with MI5

12.
Edinburgh's like that girl who's unreal pretty but really boring and Glasgow's the fatty that shows you a good time

13.
So funny at house parties on a Friday when everyone just gets too drunk and starts shouting their shift times like "I'm working 12-8 tomorrow"

14.
Right, hold the bus, who picks up a guide dog's shit?

15.
Can't stand when you're looking for something and you ask your mum where it is and she hits you with "where you left it". Yeah no bother Mystic Meg (British psychic from the 90s) fuck off

16.
I could go to the moon and back, fight two wars and still if an old friend I went to school with asked me what I'd been up to I'd still say "nothing mate, you?"

17.
Two little boys were arguing and one was like "at least I'm not a junkie" and the other replied "at least I'm not a Kit Kat chunky" because he was fat. I'm dead

18.
People who are not Scottish will never understand the struggles we face trying to pronounce the name Carl

19.
It annoys me when I put my hand out to wave for the bus and a person behind me puts their hand out too. What, do you not trust me or something? Do you have a magic hand?